December 3, 2007

Bit by the Baby Bug

*As a female of a certain age and marital status. I can't help but get all goo-goo-eyed when I see either an expecting mother or a baby. It's like my insides get all mushy, and my hormones start to sway. I swear they should make a pill to keep women from wanting to "talk baby" to every infant they see.

*Now I was born with a strong maternal side. I knew as early as elementary school that my calling in life was to be a full time Mom. The whole have a job, make a career, and climb the ladder sounded about as appealing as gnawing my own leg off. Even my family could see that I was never going to make it in the job market. They would tell me that I need to marry a rich man, so I wouldn't have to work. If that didn't work, they thought I would be a great secretary (thank you, family, for always helping me to reach beyond the stars...) Their support and confidence in my abilities left me blushing (or is that offended). Anyway, they we're right about my place in life not being a bread winner.

*Have you ever seen that out of fashion Mom lugging about at least 4 kids and looking like she might snap if one of her little darlings dared to swab another booger on her jeans. I'm a bit like Jekyll and Hyde as I sit back and think "That poor crazy woman... I can't wait to be like her!" I can see how hard and isolating it will be to stay at home with kids. On the other hand, I feel like it is the only thing I will truly be happy doing. That's the thing with callings in life. They aren't always to easiest ways to go, but it is the only way you will truly feel fulfilled.

*Now I don't plan on being pregnant for a very long time, but you better believe I will be showing of my water melon belly and making other womens hormones sway when I am!

November 8, 2007

Life as a celebrity

- - - Recently I was lucky enough to get a taste of the life celebrities live. okay so it was a tiny tiny taste, maybe even just a lick. It was a situation where my life was posted for everyone to read. well, now that I think about it, probably only a hand full of people saw it. The point is: I felt the sensation of seeing something very personal put into a story, twisted, and then regurgitated for the world to see.

- - - Now you are asking me, Mary did someone write about your fabulous weekend spent in San Antonio? no, but it was a weekend to remember. Mary did someone write about the amazing plastic bag holder that you bought at Wal-mart? wrong again, but it is my best purchase this week.

- - - Instead of all those good topics, someone decided instead to write about my dog.... to be blunt, my dead dog... my dead dog that I had to watch slowly die... My dog died of distemper less than two weeks from when we adopted her from a local shelter, a shelter that has gotten a lot of publicity (not the good kind) lately for possible inhumane issues. A shelter that many people are trying to discredit in an effort to get new management.

- - - Let's take a walk though the day... At this point, it has been a week since Lucy passed away, and I've finally stopped crying about it. Imagine my surprise when a close friend calls me apologizing profusely for an article written about me without permission. to be honest, I didn't see the big deal at first. I went to the website and read my very personal and private e-mail that I had sent to my good friend detailing the ailments and sufferings of my dog before she died.

- - - It was my e-mail, but slightly re-worded and added on. The blog author, wanting to discredit the shelter more, added words like "supposedly". I've never meet this woman in my entire life, I never gave her permission to use my story for her own purposes, and my friend that told her the story made sure she knew that I chose not to go public with it. but still, those personal, painful, and plagiarized words were glowing on my computer screen.

- - - Not only was my life plastered for the world to see like some entertaining news story, she had apparently been trying to contact my vet for more information. this broke the straw on the camels back. Let me just say our vet is amazing. She let me call 5 times a day to ask her the stupidest questions about Lucy and she was supportive every time. If this stupid blogger woman was going to cause me to loose my vet due to the trouble we were causing her... well ... I'm a Christian woman, but there was going to have to be blood shed...

- - - Of course I got the name and number of the author and called her to remove the story immediately, and of course she conveniently did not answer her cell phone or home phone. Praise God, later that day the blog post had be reduced to a few sentences, and she wrote that she would stop trying to contact our vet.

So I wasn't really a celebrity (the woman didn't even use my name in the post) but I did feel how personally it can hit you when the media tries to manipulate something you say or do. Next time that I'm blowing off time in the Wal-mart check out line, I will not pick up the latest tabloid, but instead reach for the Martha Stewart cooking magazine. I might also buy that huge box of matches that are always in the impulse buy section. who really buys matches that way! Okay, I'll save that rant for the next post..........bye!

September 4, 2007

Give me your forever

One year ago, I stood in front of God, family, and friends and married the love of my life. We promised to give each other our forever, not just a few good years, not just as long as we still felt good about each other, but we vowed on forever. I don’t think I realized what taking someone’s forever would involve, but now I have a bit more of an idea. Kevin, give me your forever….

- There are days when we you can’t seem to wipe the smile off your face. When your joy is so infectious that is impossible not to feel lifted up by being next to you. Give me your happiness to me, give me your forever.

- Some days you just can’t catch a break. It’s like a repeated onslaught of bad events and bad timing. Anger fills your chest, and someone needs to stand by your side. Give me your anger, give me your forever.

- They say that marriage is when two become one. There are times when we are so close that I have trouble finding where you end and I begin. That bond is so close and precious. Give me that connection, give me your forever.

- Those migraines pound your head. They make it hard to stand up much less concentrate on doing anything else. Some one needs to help you and watch over you. Give me your sickness, give me your forever.

- You open presents on Christmas day and I open them on the Eve. I read the fortune before even eating the cookie and you have to eat at least half before getting the read the fortune. Our traditions are different, but now in marriage they need to become the same. Give me your traditions, give me your forever.

- You went from one day being a guy that I was dating to the next day being a part of my family. People who seem like strangers are now tied together as family. You lead me into a group of people who know you so well, and know me so little. Give me your family, give me your forever.

Every day our vows become true as we hold on to each other and accept the good and the bad, the rich and the poor, the sickness and the health, the better and the worse every day from now on out. I take your forever with a happy heart, because there is no one else I would want to share my forever with than you.

August 10, 2007

Scar

No one can see the scars of the heart. But to the owner of the scar, they are always there. Like physical scars they can lay dormant for ages without anyone noticing.

It was a moment in time; a past decision you regret, a loss you never quite got over, or an event that you cannot change how it ended. That moment cuts you deep and time turns it into just a scar. My scar was over events that I lead, but yet had no control over the outcome. Not really a regret, but more of a disappointment.

Everything will be normal in life, the scar long forgotten, and then some unimportant conversation or event will remind you. Your memory starts to blossom with images and sounds of so long ago. Heat starts to grow in my body, my chest starts to tighten ever so slightly, and I feel as though I have to make my breaths purposeful.

Through years of prayer and peer counseling the events of long ago are reconciled and forgotten to most people, but I still bear my scar. I've finally gotten used to it, not really wishing for it to go away. For it is a defining moment in our lives when we receive our scars. A moment that should not be forgotten. Just like looking at the scars on our bodies can remind us of of where we have been, so too the scars on our hearts.

Life has moved me past the days I received my scar. I am healed. All that is left is a small reminder. So I will be content with my silent scar, because it has helped me get to where I am today.

August 7, 2007

Inspiration

This story is such an inspiration that anything is possible if you use your mind and determination!

Malawi youth builds a wind turbine to power his village

home_made_turbine.jpg

After having to drop out of school due to lack of funds, William Kamkwamba from Malawi decided to learn as much as he could from books that had been donated to his primary school’s library. One of the books detailed how to build a windmill that generated electricity.

With much trial and error, some local materials, and an investment of about 16 dollars, William constructed a windmill that could generate enough energy for a few light bulbs and a radio.

While a few bulbs might sound insignificant, the difference changed William’s and his family’s life entirely. Instead of using expensive paraffin candles, which produce smoke and irritate the eyes, William and his family now use the energy generated by the wind to light up their house.

The engineering youth also hooked up a car battery to his generator to use as a backup in case of a non-windy day.

May 2, 2007

Call it luck or call it faith

What do you want in life? Okay, so that's a very vague and large question. Let's get a bit more specific. Let me think... What do you want the love of your life to be like? We all have our ideas/our dreams/our hopes. I had an idea of mine. The thing is that the real love of my life turned out to be different than what I had imagined.

Now your thinking. Woah Mary, you're a married woman. Are you saying that your husband isn't the man you want? No, I'm not saying that. The man I married is the perfect man for me. What I'm saying is the process to obtain "my dream" was totally different than what I had in mind. Call it luck or call it faith, but either way my life led me on a path I didn't want to be on, but on a path that lead me to the love of my life.

Things happen in our life that seem like the exact opposite of what we want, but end up having a happy ending. These moments are only obvious in hindsight, and we are able to look fondly on them. I had to quit my job with no prospects of a new job in sight. The day I left that building,
I got a call to start a job that made three times as much money as the one I was leaving. I look back and think how thankful I was to have the faith to quit my job without any idea what the future would be like.

The events that we really struggle with are the ones that even after a few weeks of hindsight have no happy ending. I think of my sister-in-law. She was having a great semester and was already lining up a summer internship in South America to not only have a great job, but also get the research material she desperately needs to write her thesis. Then one night of dancing at a friends wedding has caused her whole future to turn into a large question mark. She hurt her knee to the point that she may have to have surgery and be stuck at home all summer. I assure you this was not the path she thought she would be on, but never the less it is where she has landed. I have faith (that with a little luck) this new path will lead her to the life that makes her happy. It may take years to see the happiness in the new path she has been lead down, but I know it will happen eventually.

This post all started with me wanting to tell the world how amazing my husband is. How he is my world, and how God has blessed me in this union. But an event has knocked me off my feet and lead me to wonder what will be the happy story at the end of my path. Kevin has been asked to live and work in Dallas for at least two weeks (and most likely more) this summer. It made my blood-pressure rise to think that his boss was asking us to miss a month of our first year of marriage, but I have to find peace in this.

Our story started with me being on a path I didn't want, so I have to believe that this will have the same happy result. That this sacrifice will bring us to a better place. Having faith is not easy, and it doesn't always seem to be the most logical, but it is always the best way. It's having faith that something beautiful can come from something ugly. That all our lives have a broken road that leads us to the life we always wanted, but never quite knew what it looked like.

April 6, 2007

Put Your Big Girl Panties on...

I've come to the conclusion the other day that I'm going to be an adult. The startling fact is that I'm actually liking the changes. Don't get me wrong; I still miss and remember fondly my college years. You have an abundance of people that are all close to your age around you. There's an endless flow of social or spiritual things you can do. And you always can party till the wee hours of the morning.

But that's has all changed now. I was talking with my co-workers about weekends, and all they talked about is going to 6th Street and getting trashed. I couldn't even remember the last time I had gone to 6th Street. Maybe it's because I'm married or because I don't have college friends around, but I was happier thinking about my lazy weekend at home fishing and renting movies.

Ways you turn into an adult:

1) Never go to sleep after 10 p.m. on a week night. Sleep is a much higher priority than partying at night. You have a real job now, and you need at least 7 hours of sleep a night. A sad consequence to this is that it is nearly impossible to sleep in later than 9:00 on weekends. Your body is so used to waking up early during the week, that someone forgot to give it the memo to sleep in on the weekend.

2) You call your parents not because you have to, but you want to. No longer seen as a dependent in their eyes, you become more of a friend. We can talk more freely about anythings, and they actually want your opinion on things. I love talking to my parents.

3) It becomes extremely hard to keep up with old friends. We all thank facebook and myspace for making it easier to know what's going on in the lives of people that used to be close to us, but its just not the same. Conversations with friends turn into long sessions of updates on what has changed since you last talked, instead of the random conversations you used to have. Ultimately distance and how often you talk play the biggest roles on which of your once numerous friendship stay close.

4) Huge financial commitments. Kevin and I are going to buy a house this summer, and to wrap your mind around a 30 Year loan is hard to handle. You go from being a naive newlywed couple to having to figure out: how many kids are we going to have? (this will determine how many bedrooms we need), is this a good school district? (it maybe a gorgeous house, but in a crummy district), what would be the monthly payment? (Sure I have a good job now, but I'm not going to have it forever). It's all really exciting. Walking into each home and imagining how your life will start to look. Maybe a park close-by that you can take the kids on picnics to or a huge tree in the back that will make a tree-house some day.

If you can think of any other ways you've become an adult, please share them! If I haven't experienced them already, it will be nice to be prepared that they are coming along the way!

February 28, 2007

So You Want to Adopt an Animal...

As a farewell to my job at the humane society, I wanted to post the info everyone should know before adopting an animal. As you can imagine, I have dealt with many, many idiotic people in the short 4 months that I worked there.

1) Spay and Neuter your pets!
If you don't want to be perceived as a complete idiot, never never never say that you would like your animal "spayded"... it's just spayed. And a hint for everyone else, male animals get neutered and female animals get spayed. You will look like a complete idiot if you schedule your animal for a neuter and bring in a female pet.

2) Don't declaw your cats!
Just so you know, it is illegal in many European countries to declaw your cat. That should make you think that maybe there is something wrong with it. Let me paint you a visual... Imagine going to the beauty parlor to get what most people consider just a nail trim or manicure. Then as they are pampering your hands, they get out a knife and saw off your fingers to the last joint. If it's not a humane practice for humans, it shouldn't be a humane practice for cats. If you want a clawless animal, get a fish!

3) Why are breeds so important?
At the shelter we hear hundreds of stories of people paying thousands of dollars for "pure breed" dogs... What's the point. Besides costing more to adopt a pure breed, they most likely cost you more at the vet since they are more likely to have medical problems. Pure breeds also have a shorter life span. Go to a shelter, save a life, and adopt a dog with a mix of breeds. You won't regret it!

4) Keep your animals...
If you have made the decision to adopt a animal, make the decision to keep the animal. It's horrible the reasons we've heard of people dropping of animals. Don't move to a place that doesn't allow you to keep your pet. Don't expect your vet bills to be cheap. Don't dump your animal at a church assuming they'll be able to take care of it. Don't assume that if you have to get rid of your animal in a short time, that you can get it into a no-kill shelter. If your new dog chews your furniture, pees in the house, and doesn't know how to walk on a leash, realize that you need to get your dog into a training school and not to the nearest shelter to drop off. Understand fully what you are getting into before you get an animal!

Okay... that's enough ranting. I loved my job at the shelter, because for as many horrible people you met, you also met as many wonderful people. I met a woman that adopted two cats, because we noticed at the shelter that when we separated the cats, their health worsened. I met people who donate hours and hours every day to scoop poop for our animals. I met a family with small children that adopted a pit bull, because they could see past the breed (they sent us pictures of their two year old kissing the dog and hanging on her tail!).