Scar

No one can see the scars of the heart. But to the owner of the scar, they are always there. Like physical scars they can lay dormant for ages without anyone noticing.

It was a moment in time; a past decision you regret, a loss you never quite got over, or an event that you cannot change how it ended. That moment cuts you deep and time turns it into just a scar. My scar was over events that I lead, but yet had no control over the outcome. Not really a regret, but more of a disappointment.

Everything will be normal in life, the scar long forgotten, and then some unimportant conversation or event will remind you. Your memory starts to blossom with images and sounds of so long ago. Heat starts to grow in my body, my chest starts to tighten ever so slightly, and I feel as though I have to make my breaths purposeful.

Through years of prayer and peer counseling the events of long ago are reconciled and forgotten to most people, but I still bear my scar. I've finally gotten used to it, not really wishing for it to go away. For it is a defining moment in our lives when we receive our scars. A moment that should not be forgotten. Just like looking at the scars on our bodies can remind us of of where we have been, so too the scars on our hearts.

Life has moved me past the days I received my scar. I am healed. All that is left is a small reminder. So I will be content with my silent scar, because it has helped me get to where I am today.

Inspiration

This story is such an inspiration that anything is possible if you use your mind and determination!

Malawi youth builds a wind turbine to power his village

After having to drop out of school due to lack of funds, William Kamkwamba from Malawi decided to learn as much as he could from books that had been donated to his primary school’s library. One of the books detailed how to build a windmill that generated electricity.

With much trial and error, some local materials, and an investment of about 16 dollars, William constructed a windmill that could generate enough energy for a few light bulbs and a radio.

While a few bulbs might sound insignificant, the difference changed William’s and his family’s life entirely. Instead of using expensive paraffin candles, which produce smoke and irritate the eyes, William and his family now use the energy generated by the wind to light up their house.

The engineering youth also hooked up a car battery to his generator to use as a backup in case of a non-windy day.

Call it luck or call it faith

What do you want in life? Okay, so that's a very vague and large question. Let's get a bit more specific. Let me think... What do you want the love of your life to be like? We all have our ideas/our dreams/our hopes. I had an idea of mine. The thing is that the real love of my life turned out to be different than what I had imagined.

Now your thinking. Woah Mary, you're a married woman. Are you saying that your husband isn't the man you want? No, I'm not saying that. The man I married is the perfect man for me. What I'm saying is the process to obtain "my dream" was totally different than what I had in mind. Call it luck or call it faith, but either way my life led me on a path I didn't want to be on, but on a path that lead me to the love of my life.

Things happen in our life that seem like the exact opposite of what we want, but end up having a happy ending. These moments are only obvious in hindsight, and we are able to look fondly on them. I had to quit my job with no prospects of a new job in sight. The day I left that building,
I got a call to start a job that made three times as much money as the one I was leaving. I look back and think how thankful I was to have the faith to quit my job without any idea what the future would be like.

The events that we really struggle with are the ones that even after a few weeks of hindsight have no happy ending. I think of my sister-in-law. She was having a great semester and was already lining up a summer internship in South America to not only have a great job, but also get the research material she desperately needs to write her thesis. Then one night of dancing at a friends wedding has caused her whole future to turn into a large question mark. She hurt her knee to the point that she may have to have surgery and be stuck at home all summer. I assure you this was not the path she thought she would be on, but never the less it is where she has landed. I have faith (that with a little luck) this new path will lead her to the life that makes her happy. It may take years to see the happiness in the new path she has been lead down, but I know it will happen eventually.

This post all started with me wanting to tell the world how amazing my husband is. How he is my world, and how God has blessed me in this union. But an event has knocked me off my feet and lead me to wonder what will be the happy story at the end of my path. Kevin has been asked to live and work in Dallas for at least two weeks (and most likely more) this summer. It made my blood-pressure rise to think that his boss was asking us to miss a month of our first year of marriage, but I have to find peace in this.

Our story started with me being on a path I didn't want, so I have to believe that this will have the same happy result. That this sacrifice will bring us to a better place. Having faith is not easy, and it doesn't always seem to be the most logical, but it is always the best way. It's having faith that something beautiful can come from something ugly. That all our lives have a broken road that leads us to the life we always wanted, but never quite knew what it looked like.