April 28, 2011

William's Anniversary

To my dear sweet William,


Today marks the one year anniversary since we lost you. I miss you dearly and think of that day all the time. It's the nights when I can't sleep that I lie in bed thinking of the last time I held you in my arms. Thoughts of the pain, exhaustion, and grief swirl through my head. It was such terrifying time in our life.


Your Dad sometimes thinks about what you would be doing now, if we had gotten to keep you. Your first laugh, sitting up on your own, starting to crawl. For some reason, I can't even imagine those things. You were never ours to keep. You were always meant to stay with God. I'm glad you never had to shed a tear, have your heart broken, or learn to question God. I imagine you as a 6 year old boy running in the clouds with Jesus watching over you.


Life is full of ironies. When I first found out I was pregnant with you, I was so upset and shocked that I wouldn't let your Dad discuss your existence with me for a whole week. I wanted to pretend that you didn't exist, until I could wrap my brain around having another baby. Now a week doesn't go by without me thinking of you.



Before you came into our lives, I had always assumed I'd have a big family full of kids. Now I thank God for giving me Clare and hope more kids are in our future. We've learned not to assume anything. God has a plan for our family, and I just have to wait and see what it is.


We miss you dearly and wish we could see your sweet face again. Please watch over your little family here on earth. I hope that if I make it to heaven one day, you are the first person I see walking me towards those pearly gates. I love you, William.



Love Always,

Mommy

April 14, 2011

Fondue Fun

I am very lucky to be a part of an amazing Mommy and Me group with Christ the King. These ladies are my sanity some days. We laugh, we over share, we watch our kids play, and we grow great friendships in the process. For our latest Mom's Night Out, I hosted a massive fondue party for us. Two hot oil pots, one chocolate, and one marshmellow pot. Not to mention pitchers of margaritas and beerritas. It was a night to remember. Thank you ladies for all the fun!




April 7, 2011

5 Reasons You're Glad You Didn't Marry Me

I know there are thousands of men out there lamenting over the fact that they didn’t get to marry me *cough cough*, so here’s a little list to assure them why they do not wish I was their wife.



5. Rude Awakening. You know right before you go to sleep; the lights are off, the house is still, your body relaxes, and your mind finally drifts off to la la land after a long day. Then out of the blue… AHH-CHOOO. My untimely sneeze wakes us all up, and we have to start the falling asleep process all over again. Can you be allergic to sleep? I swear this happens once a week.



4. Cold Feet. Due to bad circulation, my feet are in a perpetual state of frozen. Every night we sit on the couch watching TV, and I wedge my icy paws under his legs. Kevin’s reactions are either (a) wincing pain from the fact I haven’t trimmed my nails in awhile, (b) the chills, because it’s like I’m shoving an ice pack onto his skin, or (c) a large sigh, because I refuse to wear socks that might solve the icy feet problem.



3. Laundry Apathy. While I am a dutiful house maker and tend to all the laundry of the house, I do it with disdain and disregard. I refuse to fold underwear and will only sloppily fold undershirts because I can’t shut the drawer otherwise. Socks never get turned right side out before being paired up and balled into a confusing knot. Shirts occasionally get hung up inside out, because I’m too lazy to do anything about it. And many weeks, our preciously clean clothes lie in a wrinkled pile on the floor. If I don’t put it up the day I clean them, they will inevitably sit in that pile till next week’s laundry day.



2. Inappropriate Timing. As most of you know, anything and everything comes out of my mouth when I’m talking. Very rarely do I think ahead to filter what I’m about to say, which leads to some embarrassing situations. Kevin and I were eating at McAlister’s once, and my salad came with regular white crackers and some brown whole wheat crackers. When I offered Kevin both packets, he only took the regular ones. So I blabbed out the ‘joke’, “What are you racist?” This happened at the same time an African American family was walking by our table. Fail



1. Food Aggression. This is a term we used at the shelter for dogs that were both over protective of their own food bowl and felt they had a right to other dogs food bowls. Unfortunately, my husband has also diagnosed me with the same condition. Don’t you even look at my food plate, because it is all mine. But if you don’t give me some of your food, I’ll be upset all night.